Because the pressure is evenly distributed, the body can support itself upon a bed of nails without damage. However, if all that pressure is consolidated in one solitary nail, you will end up with a puncture wound.
I tend to build huge pressure points in my life, occasionally buckle under the insurmountable expectations, and then despise myself for this inexplicable incapacity to accomplish what I set out to do.
This weekend, the stress completely destroyed my body. Lots of puking and not very much sleep...gross, I know. My dad gave me this bed-of-nails analogy in an attempt to help me understand that no one can handle the kind of expectations I put on myself. Working hard, being diligent, reaching further than you have in the past for a lofty ambition is one thing. Placing your entire self-value and self-worth on the outcome of one tiny event in life is ridiculous. And yet, I do this all the time.
In a somber turn of irony, I went with my dad to visit a little girl in the hospital the next day who was running downhill too fast, fell and punctured her pancreas. Her body has a 5% chance of recovery. This beautiful, thirteen-year-old girl with french braids, a plastic tiara and long legs bunched up to her chin just smiled at me and chattered away about the rain outside.
My life is so amazing. So blessed. My afflictions are light. God is merciful.
I can accomplish more if I slow down and consistenly step in the direction I'm going--the journey is what develops and changes us. Suddenly, I understand what people mean when they tell me I need more patience and calmness. I can still do a million things and be awesome! I just have to do it one step at a time.
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