Connections

I like inspiring blogs, particularly if the writer has a witty way with words. I found Krista Maurer's blog a few weeks ago. I totally fell in blog-love with her site.

Not only does she have a way with words. She knows about marketing. She can sew bridesmaid dresses. She talks about boys the way I talk about boys. And she puts it all out there, in beautiful, simple honesty. I feel like I know her, because she has really put herself and her heart into her posts, and because I wholly relate to her taste in food, decor, and quotes. She has inspired me to be more honest and straightforward in my writing. And my living.

I told her all of this on the phone yesterday! Cool, right? Here's the story:

She knows Mindy Gledhill, because she helped market/design the album with the red balloon (I'm not even going to google the title, that's what I call that album).

She's hosting a private house concert this month, for Mindy's new Christmas CD release.

I called her and snagged two tickets. And I gushed. I couldn't help it.

Krista was so sweet and nice on the phone^^ I was completely giddy while we were talking, wtinessed by my bestie Kristen who was sitting in the car with me at the time. I'm so glad to make a new friend, and I can't wait to meet her at her super cool party.

And to top it all off, she mentioned me in a post! That's pretty cool.

I'll be headed over to the party after flying in from Seattle (I have an audition for a job coming up). My whole life is feeling very...cool, as of late.

Oh, yes! I almost forgot to mention. I watched the music video for the title song of Mindy's new album and discovered it was directed by the one and only Christopher Clark. He is a joy to work with, FYI--I've been in two of his shows. He is also hilarious in conversation; he will have you rolling on the floor, guaranteed.

So neat to see that he knows Mindy who knows Krista and now... Krista knows me! The circle of talented, amazing people in my life is ever-growing.

Happy last week of November!

The Banana Leaf

Random adventures. This is what life is about.

I was in Orem, called Kris, picked her up from the MTC. We went to a new restaurant. None of this was planned.

The restaurant was The Banana Leaf. In a cute little cottage house, owned by an adorable couple of newlyweds. He is from Srilanka. She is from California. She speaks ASL. He is a genius in the kitchen.

He explained the nutritous effects of cooking with and serving food upon banana leafs. Aren't they beautiful? We had pa'an with tikka masala chicken curry with apricot chutney. It.was.divine.
Every bite.
Was savory.
Mmm!

We also ate this roti dish with marinated beef, an eggy/flour base, and lemon chutney with chili sauce. Dang, it was gooood.

We ate it all. We licked our banana leaves clean.

Did I mention the avocado juice?

Our hosts were so wonderful and sweet; we were the first customers of the afternoon, so we had the whole place to ourselves. It was cozy. We sat next to the Christmas tree.

All of you should GO! Go and support this wonderful, delicious, family-owned business. The experience was delightful. We're going back soon to try the rest of the {seasonal}{fresh} menu.

Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving rushed upon me this year; doesn't anyone feel like it came a bit earlier than usual?
I had a lovely day at Dad's house; the kids told jokes and sang songs all morning while he cooked up a storm. Nana and Papa joined us for the meal. After dinner, we sat and discussed books, played cards, slept.

I realized that afternoon that my heart wasn't full. I went through all the motions of Turkey Day, but I never stopped to think about my blessings. I've been too busy to even notice the Holidays approaching, let alone prepare for them in a mindful, meaningful way.

I recognized the need to give thanks. Without expression, gratitude doesn't have a chance to fill my heart with happiness. My content and satisfaction in life has dwindled, not for lack of goodness but because I've neglected to slow down and take the time to give thanks.

I'm grateful for this amazing, rich life. For the little things!

For the way my dad tenderly folded the dough for his prize dinner rolls, and proudly hand-delivered them hot and fresh out of the oven to each of us before we prayed over the food.

For my stinkin' adorable niece, who said "Please, Jessica, will you hold me?" and pulled funny faces with me until we both laughed and laughed and laughed.

For the chance to see my sister as a mama, swirling her daughter around in her arms as they danced in the driveway to the car radio; to see her baby girl throw her head and her hands back as she floated through the air, free and flying, her golden hair streaming behind her.

For a family who plays and teases and giggles.

I am disappointed I didn't take advantage of Thanksgiving as an opportunity to give a peace offering to the Lord, to further my realization and enjoyment of His hand in my life. Did you know from the time of Adam until the Law of Moses was fulfilled, peace offerings were given in conjunction with a feast that symbolized fellowship and friendship among all its partakers and providers, and also a state of joy and gladness? Is this not Thanksgiving?

Christmas is around the corner, I'm aware of that now! I'm not going to let it come and go discreetly: I'm going to GIVE thanks and GIVE love and CELEBRATE this special time of year.

How?

Kris and I agreed that the best way to be mindful of the Savior and feel His love is to serve the people around us. So every day this month, we'll be serving.

In small ways, in special ways, in purposeful ways.

Rachel

My niece curled her hair with us.

It was a girl party.

She loves to do what we do, and it is so very fun to have her do it all with us. = )

Teacksas

As peaceful as I feel about my decision to step back from things with TS, it did leave me feeling blue because I really liked him and we had a lot going for us. On top of the normal try-not-to-call-him-have-some-integrity-don't-be-so-sad behavior that comes post-relationship, I had an entire week of canceled plans. See, I was supposed to meet his family while they were in town for his last VP concert, so I gave all my shows to my double at the theatre.
If there's one thing I don't know how to handle, it's unscheduled time.
I wanted to be positive, I wanted to "get in the blue and move forward," as Kris would say.*
So I got out all my fancy markers and stickers, pulled out a new posterboard, and plopped down on the floor in front of The Holiday so I could plan out the next month and make a big calendar for my wall.
When I was all finished, and saw that the weekend of the VP concert was nothing but big, empty white squares, I was more than a bit disheartened.

So, the next day I bought a plane ticket and before I knew it, I was on my way to the lovely state of Texas.

I saw my sister Athena. We got pedicures, made cookies, watched 17 Miracles, and saw an ultrasound of her peanut-sized baby!

I saw my cousin Crystal. We went camping, roasted s'mores, rode go-carts and scooters around a lake,  and went country dancing.

I saw my Uncle Taylor and Aunty Connie, Mom's youngest brother and sister, for the first time in years, and we talked, laughed, and snorted over TexMex for lunch.

I saw Aunt Merry Lee and we talked about her mission in Austrailia, I saw Nick and Jenny and Jenny's new baby, and then Joy and Brent, my first cousins once removed, took me to dinner one night and then to The Cracker Barrel for brunch the next day (so, so delicious).

It was warm and humid. It was perfect. And all the food was so very delicious!

*This phrase inexplicably came out of my mouth one night when, as she always does, Kris was listening to me spout about my latest crisis and theories. I was talking--well of course I was talking--very fast and carrying on and on and then I said, "So, I just need to get in the blue and move forward."

Silence.

And then we busted up laughing.

 Because what does that even mean? But she understood. And the phrase stuck.

Grand Opening

Not to be outdone by the high schoolers ditching Friday classes, we camped out at H&M for six hours before they opened today at Fashion Place. We got gift certificates. The girl in front of us--directly next to us in line--got a $500 gift card. Funny how I didn't have it before she did, but after she won it I felt like something was taken away from me...

It was fun to be crazy and hang out with these lovely ladies.
Good friends make life so, so good. New friends are awesome. Long-time, bestie best friends are great, too.

Kris sent me this on the night it snowed last Friday. I had to drive home in that snowstorm after an awful evening out and about. Around 2 a.m. I was contemplating getting in my car and driving to Provo, despite being tired, angry, sad, and not the best driver around. But my inspired friend called me and we had a nice long chat that totally lifted my spirits and I stayed home, warm and safe.

After shopping our hearts out, we back to my apartment and ate Tuna Ramen, Korean style, and talked about life. She cleaned out my car for me. Seriously, the best friend a girl could have, ever.

posting notes

I'm a note post-er. I've got scriptures and quotes taped up all over my mirrors and walls. Post-It notes with to-do lists, grocery lists, goal lists posted inside my wallet and on every page of my planner. Reminders on my steering wheel and dashboard.

I find a deep strength in being surrounded by powerful, inspiring words. I try to memorize them sometimes, because I want them to be in my mind, in my heart. I love sharing them, because I want my friends to feel what I feel when I read them.

So this morning, here's a glimpse of what I've got taped to my computer and desk:


"But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage." ~Mosiah 7:33


"Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work, and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings." ~Bible Dictionary


"I testify that each of us has a potential in this life and beyond the grave that exceeds our fondest dreams." ~President James E. Faust


"There is no chance, no fate, no destiny that can circumvent or hinder or control the firm resolve of a determined soul." ~Ella Wheeler Wilcox


"...I will also be your light in the wilderness; and I will prepare the way before you, if it so be that ye shall keep my commandments. Wherefore, inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandment ye shall be led towards the promised land; and ye shall knwo that it is by me that ye are led." ~ 1 Nephi 17:13


"Believe in yourselves as sons and daughters of God—men and women with unlimited potential to do good in the world. Believe in personal virtue. There is no substitute for it anywhere under the heavens. Believe in your power to discipline yourselves against the evils that could destroy you. Believe in one another as the greatest generation ever yet to live upon the earth." ~President Gordon B. Hinckley

"Search diligently, pray always, and be believing, and all things shall work together for your good, if ye walk uprightly and remember the covenant wherewith ye have covenanted one with another." ~Doctrine and Covenants 90:24

"...be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now." ~Rainer Maria Rilke

Steve Jobs:
"Remembering you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."
"You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. You have to trust in something: your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life."

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma--which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

"Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion: for who shall bring him to see what shall be after him?" ~Ecclesiastes 3:22

 "There are no constraints on the human mind, no walls around the human spirit, no barriers to our progress except those we ourselves erect.” —Ronald Reagan

"The most difficult thing is the decision to act--the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward....The most effective way to do it, is to do it." ~Amelia Earhart

"Don't let your nutty theories control your life without testing them." ~Ramit Sethi

"Press on. Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothings is more common than unsuccessful individuals with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent." ~Calvin Coolidge

"The Lord knoweth all things from the beginning; wherefore, he prepareth a way to accomplish all his works among the children of men; for behold, he hath all power unto the fulfilling of all his words. And thus it is…For he is the same yesterday, to-day, and forever; and the way is prepared for all men from the foundation of the world, if it so be that they repent and come unto him. For he that diligently seeketh shall find; and the mysteries of God shall be unfolded unto them, by the power of the Holy Ghost, as well in these times as in times of old, and as well in times of old as in times to come; wherefore, the course of the Lord is one eternal round." ~1 Nephi 9:6, 10:18-20

Breaking up is hard to do

I remember in the mornings
Strange to be in the shadow of that same
space where you scooped me,
pressed me to you
and looked into my eyes
with your green eyes.

I feel restless when I'm driving
There isn't any music
anymore; all the songs are used up.
All I hear is static and
my mind plays your words and my words
over and over.

You were an answer to this prayer
No really, I prayed for this
more than once,
and even now I know I'm getting
exactly what I want.

What do I want?

Blast my impatient, eager heart.
The whole time I was wishing
you would fight me or hug me
or kiss me
Just tell me
I was what you wanted.

I'm relieved I didn't string you along
Scared of regret
Angry I can't see the end from the beginning
when I'm choosing my path.
I'm happy to dream
but I'm insatiable
I sacrifice and gamble
and I hope.

Don't lose hope.
I'm grateful for you
and for knowing joy
and sorrow.

I pray for bridges now
and timing. There isn't a path
It's my first time
building trails and tracks
learning as I go.
There are reasons we're here,
why we built our bridge.

I'm in a world of bridges and trails and twisty tangled
stairs that lead to
the darkest, most vast sky
and I'll leap
I'm flying now
leaning into the wind and trusting,
throwing light as I go
and hoping
that this path is the one
that I want.