Well, I thought I was over you

This one time, I was in love.

And it didn't work out.

My heart was a smoldering pile of ground hamburger.

The only way to heal that, is to let it be

while you run through life like a zombie.

Then, slowly, you hand one piece of heartache over the Lord.

He heals it.

And then you hand Him another piece, when you're ready.

Piece by piece.

My heart was healed.

Back at the beginning of that process

I put everything in a box.

And walked away.

I lived a good year of learning a lot

and growing so much.

And then I got this great new job

and I'm moving to BOSTON!

but I had to clean out my storage closet

and the box where I saved stuff.

Like pictures of his hands, and a coke bottle he mailed to me

with a love letter inside

I was scared to see inside.

I still think about him.

And sometimes when I really feel alone

or pensive

I do a good job of talking myself into calling him.

Or showing up at his house.

(Not great ideas, believe me.)

Instead I call my dad,

who is like my AA sponsor,

 except for this boy I was madly in love with

and head over heels addicted to for 6 years.

And he reminds me that I am strong

and that I should make choices based on what I really want.

So opening that box might mean

my worst fear would be confirmed:

That I wasn't over him.

That I'd never be over him.

That there was a terrible mistake in my life course

and there was never any hope

of me finding someone I could love more, or better.

It was easier than expected.

I cried a little when I held a necklace he gave me.

I laughed a little when I looked through our pictures.

I'll always love who he was back then.

but

Now it's time to really let it go.

So I put some special momentos in the bottom of a box

and gave the rest away.

This was my Tyler Blanket:

I gave it to a cute kid standing on the corner of the highway

holding a cardboard sign.

"I could use a blanket," he said

as he grabbed it out of my car window.

Glad it went to someone who could use it.

Here's the bottom line, folks.

Love is good.

It is good to love and to pass through joy and sorrow.

And it is good to let it go, when you're ready.

There isn't a clean cut;

 for me this boy will never be completely severed

from my heart.

But you have days when the future feels

clear and clean and you anticipate

filling your heart with a new someone.

Because you choose to let go of the last someone.

Now I am ready for the next great love of my life.